10.04.2010

A Sad Day.

I suppose this post is more for me than anyone else.

Saturday was a very hard day.  I have not been exposed to death many times. I still have three grandparents and my Papa died when I was 4 so I didn't really remember the emotional pain of that loss.


Let me first say, loss is loss.  No matter what or who you loose, it still hurts, there is still shock and sadness, and grief to be felt.

Saturday morning John left early to do his Spanish/English Leagal Interpreter Certificate course. He will do that every Saturday this month. My mom came and woke me up at 9 and asked me to go on a walk with her. I felt a 'prompting' and knew I needed to go with her. We took our dog Honey. Honey is my mother's life.  She is her companion. She has said to me on several occasions , "if anything happened to Honey, it would kill me.". They are so attached, we have had her for 10 years. She is the most humble, sweet, and precious dog.




So, we set off on our walk and mom and I shared some great conversation about what John and I would name our babies, we talked about John's mission, and we talked about how seasons of life are much like the seasons of the year. 



Mom said she had never seen honey so excited to go on a walk before.  She was pouncing like a kitten through the fields.  She was absolutely elated.  I've never seen a little dog so happy. On our way back we were picking flowers to go in the house.  The sun shone right down on Honey and it was the most beautiful I had ever seen her. Her soft fur shone like gold in the sunlight.  I picked her up as two cars passed slowly (we do not put her on a leash because we live on a small country road). I felt her little heart beat in my arms so strong as she had just finished running through the field.  As the two cars passed I put her down and immediately a teenager in a huge SUV came barreling down the small country road at about 55 mph. Honey ran over to the other side and we were nervous and called her name to come to us. The speed was far too much and as she came towards us, the car did not slow at all and ran her over as she almost made it to the other side.

It was the most traumatic and horrible thing I have ever experienced. I was screaming and crying and my mother went over and rubbed her as she died. She went very quickly.  I am glad she did not have to suffer too much. My heart broke as I looked in to the eyes of my mother as she watched her little companion die.  We cleaned her up off of the road and the girl gave us a plastic box to take her home in.  The girl drove us to our house and dropped us off. 



My mother and I grabbed two shovels and went deep in to our woods to burry her. I thought of how the pioneers must have felt when burying their deceased children on their journeys west.  I cried as I shoveled the dirt to make her grave.  We talked about how grateful we were that we were safe but how sad it was to loose her. When John came home we all went out to where my mom and i had buried her and John said a very comforting prayer.


I cried all day Saturday. I didn't shower. My face was swollen and John still kissed me and loved on me as unattractive as I was. I hope we will see her again. She brought us so much love and happiness.



Dear little girl, we hope you are happy and running in the fields of heaven.  We hope you are doing the funny little things you always did.  We hope you know we loved you so much and feel better for having had you in our lives.  We hope we can follow your example of following your master and in turn follow our Master, Jesus Christ. We hope to follow your perfect happy childlike example. We will miss you.

13 comments:

Becca Jane said...

Oh no!! I'm SO sorry to hear about Honey. I still remember when my childhood dog of 11 years died when I was 14. Dogs are truly members of the family, absolutely. I'm so sorry you had to witness it. I hope you feel better soon...I'm sure Honey is running around with my Pepper, and we'll get them back someday!!

Tunes & Spoons said...

I hope Honey and Pepper are running around too! I hope they are listening to John Mayer and having a puppy party!!!

Sara said...

Aw, I'm sorry, Rachel. Sometimes I feel sort of silly for being sad over the death of the family pets, but they are so special -- in ways that humans can never be.

I hope you feel better soon.

Katy said...

Oh Rachel! I remember Honey well and this breaks my heart for you and your whole family. Prayers of comfort and love are being sent your way. I'm so glad you were there to comfort her and your mom that morning...may she rest in the peace of a life well lived!

e.day said...

i'm so sorry for your loss and that you had to witness something so tragic.

it was so fortunate that you were able to be with your mother at such a difficult time. i'm sure it made her feel better in such a difficult and emotional time.

i hope you feel better!

Joan said...

I'm so sorry, Rachel! This made me cry!!!! This hurts my heart more than usual because my cat ran away a few days ago... I understand how hard it is to lose a pet but I can't even imagine it happening in front of my own eyes. At least Honey is in a better place and she knows how much you all loved her and how much she meant to you. (Hugs and kisses to you and your whole family)

Laura/DaPFG said...

How horrible :( I saw nearly the exact same situation happen a few weeks back, and I still replay the image of the whole thing on a daily basis. There was nothing we could even do for the guy, so we just kept driving. Four lane road with a median in the middle. :( <3 my thoughts are with you guys.

Anonymous said...

Rachel, I love this tribute to our little Honey. I miss her warm body next to me and her feet next to mine. She made me so happy. I am sad...Love, Mom

Clarise and Ryan Pedersen said...

I would feel the exact same way if my little puppy passed on. My heart goes out to you, your mom, and honey.

Christina said...

Oh Rachel.... I lost my golden retriever Louie a year and a half ago and I still miss him. I always told your Uncle David that Louie was the best person I ever knew and that's still true. All the excellent dogs (and the not so excellent) must be romping in heaven. My God just wouldn't do it any other way. So sorry for all of you.....Christina

Tunes & Spoons said...

Thank you all so very much. Your comments have each meant so much to us. I have read them all to my mother and they have provided so much comfort.

Jenni said...

Oh no, no, NO!! I am crying very real tears for you right now... just stumbled upon your blog and this post, and I am SO very sorry that happened to you. I love my dogs more than I love most people and I can't imagine the pain you and your mother must feel after witnessing that. If there is a God and there is a heaven (which I do believe there is), and if human beings can make it to that heaven, then dogs ABSOLUTELY will be there as well. Their souls, in my opinion, are the very purest of all living things.

On a brighter note, I just adore your blog and I'm really looking forward to following you!!! :)

Apple said...

This made me cry. I know the pain of losing a beloved dog &best friend. Thank goodness we will someday get to be with them again. I hope your mom will get another dog that will be as good of a friend to her as Honey. (Not that anyone could ever replace Honey, but we can have joy in new friends.)

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